When I read the article I have linked below I cried, it was so beautiful. It’s a subject not talked about often and that is relationships that survive transition. These are the relationships that are truly built on love and commitment and not on what the neighbours think. I’m blessed that I am in such a relationship.
For those of you who are not in a relationship with a transsexual, take a look at your partner. What about them would really change if they came out to you? As the writer in the article stated “Over time I came to believe that my husband, as my wife, would be in most ways the same person: intelligent, compassionate, mature, with the same slim build.” The trans-woman in this case started with the facial feminizing surgery (FFS) so the first physical change would be rather dramatic. But even with the altered look, is the person inside going to be very different?
One of the many points she made echos what I’ve mentioned in a previous blog entry and that is the person one marries dies when they transition. In their place is someone new who has the same personality as the one that was lost but a different way of expressing themselves. At the core, though, they are the same person. The same person who loves their partner, their children, their family and their friends. In that sense nothing has changed. The only thing that might change is the love they show may not be returned and that is sad.
But articles like this make me really happy because they show that relationships do not have to end. Marriages are supposed to be “for better or for worse” and “until death do you part.” These words are beautiful and not supposed to be just for the wedding ceremony but for the rest of your lives. Too bad more marriages didn’t last like this and by this I don’t only mean ones where a partner is transsexual.